After recent reports that GPs are to be urged routinely to administer breath tests to those over sixty five in an attempt to enforce a new, lower limit of alcohol consumption on this patient group, and to run blood tests to detect abuse of illegal substances, I am happy to say that there has been more cheerful reading in the medical press. On three fronts, in fact.

 

Firstly, the Journal of the Federation of American Societies for Experimental Biology has published research reporting that the chemical compound resveratrol, a substance produced during exercise that protects the body from the deadly consequences of a sedentary life style, occurs naturally in red wine. This means that those of us who have not done so already can cancel our gym memberships and go for the burn while relaxing in front of the telly. The editor of the journal, Dr Gerald Weissmann, is quoted as saying “There are overwhelming data showing that the human body needs physical activity, but for some of us getting that activity isn’t easy. Resveratrol may not be a substitute for exercise, but it could slow deterioration until someone can get moving again.”  Good enough for me, Dr Weissmann, and thank you for letting us know.

 

The plan then is this: switch to red exclusively, then go for a sensible jog of an evening while watching Channel Four News, and at the weekend do a half marathon. You’ll be in cracking shape in no time. Don’t let the fact that the original research was conducted in Strasbourg put you off – they do some pretty nifty science over there in France.

 

Secondly, clinical scientists in this country have discovered that high salt intake is not bad for you. Indeed, lowering your consumption can be very bad for you, even fatal, causing, among other problems, your kidneys to explode (this is not the precise medical term, which is in Latin). So now it appears that the sinister gangs of council employees who tour fish and chip shops, most recently in Grimsby of all places, confiscating salt shakers have, far from protecting their constituents from hypertension as they in their conceit believed, been posing a serious risk to life.Will they repent?

 

Thirdly, it has been announced that the received advice from NHS Direct and others that we all drink eight pints of water a day (coffee doesn’t count) is not only unhelpful nonsense but dangerous. Just this week the press reported that Nigella Lawson has been warned by her doctor about her self-confessed aquaholic life style – there was a photograph of her clutching several bottles of the stuff. Shall we now see an end to the spectacle of sanctimonious twits toting bottles of water wherever they go?

 

Must go – I’m planning to do a hundred press-ups before dinner.

 

Best wishes,

 

Howard